It can have it’s perks and sometimes it’s stresses. I was 18 when I found out I was going to be a Mum for the first time. I was excited, nervous, scared, and every emotion going really, but I just went with it and I’m glad I did.
Having that baby bump at a young age got me a few dirty looks in the street and quite a few unwanted comments from strangers.
‘You’re throwing your life away’
‘You can’t do anything with your life now’
‘You don’t look old enough to be having a baby’
I was also asked whether I would be able to cope being so young. To be honest, it shouldn’t really affect your parenting skills so long as you put your child first. No matter what age you are, it’s a learning curve for ALL new parents.
Would us younger Mums comment similar criticism back to Mums who are perhaps a lot older than we are?
I know I wouldn’t – it’s none of my God-damn business. Parenting is hard at any age. Getting to know your child, sleepless nights, dirty nappies and the endless crying, but either way we all do our best for our children. Being a parent doesn’t come with a manual, so we have to take it as it comes!
When I came to have Faith I still got dirty looks off people, but if I must say so myself, she was clean and well-looked after and I was doing the best I could (It could have been a lot worse).
When Wyatt was thrown into the mix (17 months later), the comments became worse. Somebody even uttered:
‘Oh my God, you’re mad having 2 kids so close together. There’s no way you can do it!’
Not exactly a confidence builder, but it just felt better proving them wrong!
I was 20 years old when I had Wyatt and I must admit going from one to two was difficult at first (more to accustom myself to) but I don’t think it was anything to do with my age. I have met some amazing young Mums out there that are too doing a great job looking after their children, but I’ve also seen some not-so-great Mums as well – it’s all about prioritising the kids and how much effort you are willing to put in for them.
Since 18 all I’ve ever known is being a Mum so I never went out partying, doing stuff regular 18 year olds do, but instead stay home and look after my children – it’s not about me anymore.
I do understand why some people may think being a young Mum is a bad idea, but to be perfectly honest I don’t really think i’m missing out on much – I’d rather cuddle up with my children and watch a family movie than go out drinking with a hangover the following day.
Being a young Mum doesn’t mean you are throwing your life away, it just means there may be some sacrifices earlier on in life that you have to make. I must say it’s definitely worth it because you have this little person who looks up to you with hope in their eyes and will love you forever unconditionally.
It is certainly hard work – there will be days where it can be extremely challenging no matter whether you have one or more kids. I have had countless challenges with my four children especially when Kiiara was born – having them all kick off at once makes my head explode (not literally of course), but having them all when I’m young just makes it easier for me and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Young Mums vs Older Mums
Again it really doesn’t matter when you decide to have children. There are pros and cons for each decision either way. Here are a few pros to each:
Being a Young Mum:
- You are healthy and energetic
- When the kids are older, you can relate to their current circumstances easier and have more time to spend together
- More chance of bigger families
- Plenty of support
- Can still enjoy life after kids have grown up
Being an Older Mum:
- Well-established and have life experiences
- More chance of a settled life and good wealth
- Taken more seriously
- Can enjoy life & focus on career prior to kids
- Can get support from others in similar situations
I’m 26 years old now and still get dirty looks off people when i’m walking through town with my 4, but it’s none of their business (it’s not like they have to deal with them) so I don’t care what they think.
Stand up – be proud of being a Mum. Whether you are a young Mum or an older Mum, if you already know that your kids come first, you are doing fantastic job! Keep it up!
If you have had any similar experiences as a young Mum facing off on a judgemental on-looker, or you just wish to share your opinion, please feel free to post your comments down below!
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