I had always fantasised being a Dad later in my life – a 30 to 40 year old man who had settled in a career, a nice family home with a car and a drive, and married to the love of my life.
Nothing ever goes according to plan, but I don’t regret a single moment of it.
Making The Decision
I was with Zoe for a few months now, helping her raise Faith and Wyatt. We were very loved up and enjoyed spending time together.
Zoe was on the implant – a contraception that is inserted into the arm. She had been on it for years and not long before we met, had it replaced.
Every now and again Zoe would joke about having a kid together (hint hint, nudge nudge. I know how you girls work!). I’d refuse every time, but it got me thinking about it in the back of my mind. How I’d love to have a child with the woman I love!
One midsummer’s night, we had settled in bed and were talking about anything and everything. The conversation moved onto the kids and how we didn’t enjoy sharing them with Mr D. Out of the blue, though not intending to say it out loud, Zoe burst out with:
‘Shall I get my implant removed?’
To her surprise and in total positivity, I replied with
Gobsmacked as she was, we both shared a loving gaze together and cuddled through the night.
No Going Back Now
It came the day to have Zoe’s implant removed. We drove up to the family planning clinic and struggled to find a parking space. Worried we wouldn’t be able to have it removed before closing, I parked on double yellow lines. (They’re only open on Tuesdays, and we didn’t want to have to wait another week).
We sat in a quiet waiting room with our number. There were few others sat around, many of which were teenagers. Uncomfortable as we were, we conversed between ourselves.
In the back of my mind I was thinking about my car and not wanting to get fined. No sign of Zoe getting called in just yet, so I ran outside to my car to move it. I found a reasonable space not too far away and ran straight back to the clinic.
Moments later Zoe was called in. Just in time……
This paramount moment was the beginning of something yet to come. I was both nervous and excited from what this was going to stimulate (Don’t be dirty guys. That comes later!).
Her implant had been removed. There was no going back now!
Trying For A Baby
After having the implant out, Zoe and I had been trying for a little while. This was the fun part, as you can imagine.
It wasn’t too long after Fifty Shades of Grey had been released and we were enjoying our couples time together. Date nights, mountain adventures, and long drives.
Though we were enjoying our freedom at that time (whilst the older two had been spending time with their Dad on the weekends), it didn’t take that long for things to start progressing.
That takes us onto the next section.
Things were different and I don’t mean between Zoe and I, but instead her well being. She had been shopping in Morrison’s for our weekly shop and suddenly became dizzy and nauseous.
Zoe’s friend was concerned and proclaimed she ought to buy a pregnancy test out of curiosity.
Back at home, Zoe took the test. She called me in and asked
‘Am I seeing things or is there two faint lines?’
I took the test from her and squinted.
‘There’s definitely something there’
Zoe replied, ‘Oh my God, we’re pregnant!’
I shot over to Zoe, pulled her close and gave her a huge cuddle. We were extremely happy. That was it, I now knew I was going to be a Daddy! 9 months and counting!
12 Week Scan
It was time to go and see baby for the first ever time. We made our way to the hospital and waited in reception ready to be called.
10 minutes later, it was Zoe’s turn. We entered the sonographer’s room. This was the first ever time I had been in one. I’ve seen them plenty of times in the movies, but this was much darker and more confined. It hadn’t bothered me though as I was about to see our baby for the first time.
The sonographer positioned the Doppler onto Zoe’s belly and there baby was. On the screen clear as day. I couldn’t stop myself, a tear fell from my eye. Zoe and I looked at each other and shared a look. We were overjoyed and ecstatic. We made a baby!
After seeing baby, we knew what we had to do next. We had to make…….
A baby was baking inside of Zoe, so it was important to get everything ready beforehand. This meant baby clothes, Moses basket, fitted sheets, nappies, toys, car seat/ carrier, pram, hospital bag and much more.
THE SHOPPING BEGAN. 6 months pregnant and looking around for bits and bobs we may have needed for baby. I’m quite a traditional guy – what my parents did when I was younger I would have liked to have done with my own kids.
They have baby books of me and my sisters. This was something I knew I wanted for my first born at least. Looking around for one was a bloody nightmare! It was late winter and no where seemed to have supplied a decent one.
I was adamant not to spend a fortune on one, but soon realised the only way I could get one was if I went to a baby specialist store – one that rhymes with ‘Brothercare’.
Inside the store, it was perfect for somebody like me who wanted to splash out on my newborn.
I looked at the baby books. They were quite pricey, but seeing as how this will be a priceless sentiment for when our child is older, a few extra pennies is worth it.
Supporting Zoe Through Pregnancy
As Zoe progressed through her pregnancy, and sizing up bigger than a balloon, I had to be there to assist her in her daily housework amongst other things.
I was there for her for whatever she needed, bought her food she was craving and massaged her when she was aching. A shoulder to cry on when she was hormonal, a person to vent to, and a person to love her and call her beautiful when she felt ugly.
I wasn’t going to half-ass this Dad thing. I was serious about it and I take full responsibility for my decisions and actions! This meant taking care of the woman who was going to be bringing our baby into this world.
Throughout the pregnancy I also wished to bond with baby despite her being inside Zoe’s belly. I used to talk to baby and sing to her, and if I was lucky enough, she’d kick and move about for me.
The day came when we were to finally meet our little baby in person. It seemed like a long while inside the hospital, but when things got moving, they certainly got moving!
The birthing pool was set up, and Zoe was inside. She was going through a lot of pain (as you do when you’re pushing a giant melon-sized human through your privates!).
I didn’t like seeing her in pain, it made me very emotional. I knew I had to continue to hold her hand through this. She was screaming at me, tears streaming down her eyes and gripping onto me, slowly dragging me into the water with her.
When I came up for air again, baby was almost here. The midwife checked. Not long left. Pushing, pushing, pushing, then swoosh, out she came! Baby was here, swimming out into the pool. Jet-black hair and looking healthy. The midwife collected her from the pool.
How beautiful she was! I can’t fathom the feelings I felt that day when I saw her for the first time.
‘AURORA, she’s called Aurora.’ Zoe revealed to the midwife.
We migrated over to the bed. Zoe was sore but she was doing okay. Aurora was handed over to us. We had a closer look at her. She was perfect, no doubt about that at all.
I WAS A DADDY!
If you wish to read more about the birth of Aurora, you can check out her birth story here.
Even today, she’s grown to be such a loving, beautiful, funny, intelligent little girl and we will continue to love her forever! Our Aurora, our display of love for one another, never to be broken, forever and always!
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