Being a Mum of three girls, I thought the way Wyatt was is because he’s a boy. But as he’s gotten older and i’ve compared him to other young boys his age, i’ve realised that it isn’t the reason he’s different at all.
I’ve mentioned before in one of my posts about Wyatt having learning difficulties (you can read that here) but as the years go by the way he behaves directs toward having autism. It’s not severe but it’s there all the same.
I went to his speech therapy appointment yesterday at school and spoke openly about how Wyatt is and she asked me questions like ‘Do you think he’s different to his siblings and other children? How’s his sleeping? Toileting habits?’ etc.
I had to answer honestly and said “yes he is different”.
His sleeping pattern isn’t great and with his toileting, he often forgets to flush the toilet and I have to constantly remind him to wipe and wash his hands.
With everything I told her she noted down and also advised me to go and get a doctors appointment sorted asap. She is also going to keep an eye on him and speak to the school nurse so she can give me a few pointers about dealing with his behaviour.
He’s not a naughty child but he does naughty things. He just doesn’t seem to understand what he’s doing – he’s very impulsive. As she was doing the assessment on his speech, Wyatt kept wiping his face with his hand – it’s just one of the little things he does. He will also sit and make a noise over and over again but he doesn’t seem to realise he’s doing it.
The speech therapist picked up on this and I felt a little bit of relief to know that i’m not crazy and it wasn’t just me thinking it. It might sound silly but when i’ve mentioned the things i’ve noticed before whether to a teacher or somebody else, they’d looked at me like I was crazy and it made me feel like perhaps I was being a bad mum and pointing out things that aren’t actually there at all. It could have been just me thinking there was something wrong with him.
Thinking like that made me feel like a terrible mum. It could have come across as bullying Wyatt for telling him off alot because of the way he behaved, but to be honest it’s difficult sometimes. I have to realise that Wyatt is wired differently and I have to take the time to explain why he shouldn’t have behaved that way and remember to keep my cool.
Wyatt is my pride and joy and no matter how hard things are sometimes with him I just want him to thrive and know it’s ok to be different. Do I worry about his future? Yes I do. I worry that he’s not going to be accepted. I worry he will get bullied when he gets to high school. I worry he will be led astray because he doesn’t sense danger.
Being a Mum means you’re there to protect your children to help them thrive – to be there to pick up the pieces when they need you to.
Even though my lovely little boy is different and needs extra support, he’s still my lovely little boy and I will be there to help him through the years. I wouldn’t say it’s easy because some days it’s not. I’ve cried before now, not because of frustration or even anger but because it’s hard to see him struggle. It’s hard to see him backtrack with something he’s learnt and now forgotten. It’s hard to see him break down over the tiniest of things but even with all this going on i’m grateful that he’s a happy little boy.
He’s my boy and I couldn’t be prouder and love him anymore than I do right now. We may run into some difficulties throughout the years as he grows up but we will get through it together as a family.
This is dedicated to Wyatt my wonder boy.
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