Knowing Your Child: The Accusations vs The Truth

I was approached on Friday by Faiths teacher accusing her of misbehaving in school. I know Faith, and this doesn’t normally happen. Something must be wrong. Find out what’s been going on and more here!

It was Friday afternoon and time to collect the children from school. It was their last day before they broke up for half term. They usually do something fun on the last day, in which this time there was a workshop taking place called ‘Bright Sparks’.

It was to show the kids how electricity works and allow them to attempt little experiments with sounds  and more. Sounds fun right?

The thing is though Faith missed it and got made to sit in a classroom and do work whilst the rest of her class went to enjoy the workshop because she’s classed as a ‘naughty child’.

As you can imagine I wasn’t happy, so lets start with the back story shall we…

…It was a normal day. The usual school run took place. Wyatt came out first and then we had to wait an extra 10 minutes for Faith’s class to finish. As we saw Faith waiting with her teacher, we waved which would usually signal her to come over and join us, but not today. The teacher held her back. She needed to speak to me. At that point I didn’t know what happened. I assumed she had been in an accident with another child playing on the yard, perhaps bumped heads. But to our surprise the teacher said that Faith had missed the ‘Bright Sparks’ workshop because of her behaviour.

According to the class teacher Faith had answered canteen staff back, and wouldn’t move off the chair when they told her to. She apparently runs around the classroom in the middle of lessons and is nasty to the other children. They said her behaviour is deteriorating and if it carries on they will have to call us in for a meeting.

Liam and I looked at each other. This did not sound like our daughter at all. She’s by no means a saint and has a big personality with a big attitude, but she can sit for hours colouring, she enjoys practicing her writing, and copies from story books. She has even asked for a notebook for her birthday so she can write stories.

There was no way she would get up and run around the classroom randomly. We said to Faith’s teacher that we would have words with Faith and try to reign in her behaviour.

As we were saying this, a child Faith had mentioned a few times before then was chasing her around outside the school. I called her over and said that she needs to behave at school. She got upset and went to stand by the wall. The said child that was chasing her told her to run away from me and ignore me. I must admit I was fuming.

I grabbed my daughter and said to the little boy “Go away you little troublemaker!”

I swear if his mum wasn’t speaking to the head teacher at that time, I think I would have flipped at her – I’ve never been so angry (this same boy has followed my daughter into the girls toilets previously attempting to get into the cubicle with her).

I spoke to my daughter on the way home about what happened for her to get into trouble so badly. She was in pieces. To Liam and I something just didn’t seem right about what they we’re saying about her. You see Faith tells me when she’s been in trouble and what’s happened that day, and there’s always the same kids name’s that keep coming up.

On asking her about Friday on the walk home, she said that the canteen staff said she had 10 minutes to finish her dinner otherwise it would go in the bin. Faith explained that she got upset and they wanted her to move seats, but because she was upset she didn’t budge (she is only 7 and quite sensitive sometimes). We’ve had her hide under the table at her old school before now because she was poorly and was forced to miss a school trip.

With them accusing her of running around the classroom, I questioned Faith about that too. She told me that she got chased around by the same child I mentioned earlier – she doesn’t just get up and run around.

The nastiness to other children is the one thing I couldn’t believe. Yes I have told her that she needs to stick up for herself if anybody hits her or calls her names but she knows better than to be a bully.

I told her what the teacher said to us and through the tears, she told us that this girl that had also been mentioned a few times by Faith, attacks her on the yard at break times and call her names. I honestly want to know how the teachers are missing this and Faith is getting the blame for all of it instead? With the answering back I honestly think she’s trying to explain her side of the story, but they are ignoring her and classing it as answering back. She said the teacher’s just don’t listen.

I’m not one of these parents who think that their children can’t do no wrong. Believe me if they do something they are not supposed to, they definitely know about it! I want them to be respectful and not become bullies, but I also want them to be themselves and not be punished for it. Faith does have a big personality for such a small person but it makes her who she is. She doesn’t answer us back at home but she does try and explain her side. She can be hyperactive and silly but she’s not a ‘naughty child’. She’s asked to be moved from the children that are distracting her at school but the teacher has simply refused.

My point in this post is that I know children can act differently when they are not with their parents, but you know your child more than others and if it doesn’t make sense to you about what people are saying about your child, then it’s best to dig a little deeper and find out the root of the problem. Don’t just take what others are saying about your child and sweep it under the carpet.

I’m welcome to the idea of a meeting with the school and I will be taking Faith in the meeting with me so she can explain her version of the events as well. I know she doesn’t act up unless there is a reason to. I will be telling this to the teachers and logging down all the incidents with the other children to show them at the meeting.

So ladies, if something doesn’t seem right what people are saying about your child, then follow your instinct – it’s usually right! And kick ass until you get to the bottom of it – you know your little one better than anybody!

I will be defending my daughter 100%

Luckily enough it’s half term now so she doesn’t have to worry about school for a week.

 

I would love to hear if any of you have had anything similar happen with your child, or maybe you can relate with how you felt in school being labeled as the problem. Let us know in the comments section below!

 

Love a protective mama bear

 

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-Zoe

 

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Roman Day & A Diva Daughter

Having to dress up for school seems like fun, but when they ask you to make it from scratch in a short amount of time – it’s nearing impossible. Having to deal with a grumpy daughter is the result of this. Find out what happened here!

It was Roman day at school for Faith’s year yesterday.

We received a last minute letter about making a roman costume. I looked at the letter and thought to myself “Oh God. I can’t even sew, let alone make a complete outfit in two days!” That’s more of a Liam thing but we just didn’t know where to start and we didn’t have anything to use either.

We spoke to Faith about this disclosing that we would have attempted to make her a costume if we had the materials to make it and actually understood what kind of costume we had to make. I’m thinking it was meant to be a Roman soldier because they had made shields out of cardboard in school earlier that week.

This sweet little girl of ours wasn’t happy that we didn’t make her a costume. She threw out suggestions of what we could use, which if I’m honest were fairly inventive suggestions but we just didn’t have any paint for it.

After explaining this she became to act like a grumpy teenager (I’m really starting to wonder whether she is one but in a 7 year old’s body). She went to her room removing cardboard that she was using to make things with and threw it in the hallway saying,

“Well I don’t need this then if I can’t do anything with it.”

She then stomped off back into her room. Liam and I looked at each other and laughed. She can be a stroppy mare when she wants to be.

She then came back out not even 5 minutes later saying,

“I don’t get why you can’t just make me a costume. It’s not hard. You could use a pillowcase or that cardboard.”

We replied,

“We don’t have the paint for it but you can always do it next year and there is going to be plenty of opportunities to dress up at school because they usually do events throughout the year, such as for Christmas, Easter and more.”

She pouted at us and uttered “fine” while stomping back into her room. She was still complaining about us in her bedroom and how it wasn’t fair. I opened her bedroom door and asked “what?”. Attempting to suppress a giggle, she shouted “go away!” and closed the door once again.

I pushed the door open slightly and asked “what?” again. I must admit I was tormenting her. I know what she’s like, she’s just like me down to a T. Her attitude was exactly the same as mine when I was younger. It’s really funny to see yourself radiating from another human being.

As I opened the door she shouted “get out!” With a little giggle I knew she couldn’t stay mad for long. She attempted to use the door stop to lock us out but Liam went in this time. She was sulking behind the door.

I asked her for a cuddle and she said,

“No. I’m too upset.”

I then asked,

“Will you give daddy a cuddle?”

She got straight up and went over to Liam and gave him a huge hug with a massive grin on her face. In this household Liam is the favourite when it comes to Faith. She looks up to him and enjoys spending time with him. I even get told off if Liam and I are messing around. She sticks up for her Daddy everytime, to his amusement of course!

You see I know how Faith works. Don’t get me wrong she can be a complete cow when she wants to be, but she’s mostly just a grumpy sod and I won’t tell her off for that, as you may have read the post I wrote about kids dealing with their emotions themselves (you can read it here).

In my eyes she has to learn how to deal with her feelings and be able to calm herself down. It obviously worked after she had a cuddle off Liam, she soon cheered up and showed us a picture she had been working on using kids nail varnish (non toxic of course).

When I was Faith’s age I remember getting annoyed if my parents ever said no to something I really wanted to do. I remember stomping off into my room and doing exactly the same thing as Faith did. I even came out grumping at my Mum and Dad!

I even remember them laughing about it and I soon softened and ending up laughing as well, finally cheering myself up. It’s almost like deja-vu.

It’s a very strange feeling looking at a mini you that acts just the same way as you did when you were younger. I’m just hoping she doesn’t make the same mistakes as I did as a teenager. I don’t think i’m ready for that, especially how much worry I put on my parents throughout.

I am really proud of our little girl. She’s growing up to be such independent little lady even if she has a big attitude. I wouldn’t change her for the world. It’s just who she is and I hope as she grows, she will use that big personality of hers for something good.

 

I’d love to hear any stories from you about your diva daughters or son’s with sassy attitudes and what usually sets them off. How do you deal with it? I’d also like to hear some funny stories too!

Parenting is exhausting sometimes so remember if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry. Enjoy the sass before they grow up to become proper teenagers – they aren’t as easy to get around with a playful giggle and a cuddle then.

 

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-Zoe

Toddler Independence & How to Deal With It

When a toddler gets to a certain age, they want to be able to do things themselves without Mummy or Daddy. If they aren’t given the chance, they have a tantrum. I talk about this with Aurora and how I deal with it. Read about it here!

Since Aurora has turned two she’s shown that she wants to be more independent and I must say it’s the cutest thing ever!

I’ve recently seen a article on Facebook – a diary of a two year old explaining how toddler’s minds work. It’s a good read and I think it has good points about children of that age and how they think.

It mentioned about how we as parents teach our children to walk, speak and learn new things and we praise them for it, but when they hit the age of 2 the rules start coming into place. The word “no” is thrown around a lot which then leads to a toddlers frustration. That then leads to temper tantrums because they haven’t fully grasped their emotions and know how to behave yet.

In the diary it mentioned that when a toddler wants to do something such as get themselves dressed or brush their own teeth parents take over and do it for them, which in  Auroras case it causes a major meltdown – especially at bedtime when I get her pj’s on after a bath. It definitely feels like a fight as she flails around refusing to get them on.

I had the same problem with her last night but she was adamant that she wanted to get her own pajama bottoms on. I decided to let her – I thought it might make my life easier and as well it will give her the feeling of achievement doing it herself. The smile that radiated off her face just because she did it was extremely cute! She even clapped her hands together and said “did it”. I couldn’t help but smile.

This not-so-little girl of ours just wants a slice of independence, so who am I to deny her that? I keep her out of dangerous situations and the word “no” is used a lot but a parent teaching them right from wrong at an early age is IMPORTANT!

I took Auroras reins with me this morning when I took the children to school just in case she wanted to walk. Her pushchair is also broken so we thought we’d get her used to walking on them too.

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After we dropped the children off, on the way back home we put her on her reins and to our surprise she walked all the way back without asking once to be picked up. She was certainly enjoying the freedom of walking around without being tied down to a pushchair. The smile on her face was priceless. Another step of independence for her! She was just chatting away as she went, pointing out the birds uttering “hiya birdies”. She was in her element.

When we returned home she was grumpy and tired from the walk back, and after she calmed down we made her breakfast and tried to get her into her highchair. She wasn’t interested one little bit. She just wanted to get out and play but she was also hungry.

I pulled up a chair for her so she could sit next to me at the table to eat her breakfast. As I put her on the chair she smiled and happily ate her breakfast with no problems. I think she enjoyed being able to sit on the big girl chair just like the older children and Mummy and Daddy.

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I think as a toddler they need that little bit of freedom to explore the world and learn who they are and what they can do. With Aurora getting to do these things today she’s become a happy little lady.

I’m not saying to let them do whatever they want, otherwise you will have complete chaos on your hands. Toddlers can be little assholes most the time but I think with a little bit of leniency when they want to be a little bit independent, it will help their self-esteem and they’ll feel a sense of achievement as they learn new things along the way.

I’ve learnt that when Aurora has her tantrums, rather than getting all crazy at her, I ponder for a moment and think how she may be feeling and what I could do to help her. The main reasons she’s a grumpy madam is either because she’s hungry, tired or not able to do something she wants to do. I breath through it and think this tiny human is still learning her emotions and the way of the world.

We used to be that age once. I could imagine I drove my Mum loopy and to think I have to do it all over again with Kiiara, but luckily I have a while yet before she turns two.

So if you ever feel frustrated with that tiny human you created, just think they are only simply learning how to deal with their feelings. Plus if it all gets too much, a nap always helps and you get a bit of peace and quiet, and a well earned coffee too! (if you want one that is).

 

I would love to hear some stories of your tiny childs’ two’s and how they’ve shown their independence as they’ve grown up.

Love a proud Mama

 

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-Zoe

From Breast to Small Food Fest – Beginning the Weaning Process

When a baby becomes old enough, they can soon begin eating small foods. The transition always scares me, so i’m always on edge and watch like a hawk. I talk about the weaning process with my children and my worries when Kiiara begins very soon! Read about it here!

Kiiara will be 6 months old on the 29th of this month and I don’t think i’m ready for her to be that age just yet.

Since she’s our last baby for a long while, i’m trying to hold on to her petiteness that little bit longer even though I know it’s not possible and they all grow up eventually.

Seeing as how she’s nearly 6 months old I know that I will have to start giving her food soon. I usually start with baby puree jars that are 4 months+ but if I’m honest I have a great deal of sadness knowing I’m going to be doing this soon as she’s currently solely getting milk from me and I just love our bond. I know it will be the main source of nourishment for her for a little while longer but it’s the thought of her growing up that scares me.

I might come across as selfish but I think when you know it’s your last baby for a long time or your last one completely, you hang on to them that little bit tighter. I think it’s just a Mum thing and it could be contributed by the fact my oldest baby is going to be 8 years old in 2 weeks time. They all seem to be growing up far too quickly for my liking.

Anyhow there is a thing called baby-led weaning where you give your babies from the age of 6 months onwards, finger foods. I know a lot of parents have taken this approach with their children but it terrifies me to say the least. I’ve always been an overprotective Mum and i’d also say i’m overly cautious too but there is a reason behind it, which is Wyatt…

…I tried the baby-led weaning with him when he was younger and he started choking and turned blue after devouring a piece of toast. Ever since then it terrified me to give them finger foods until atleast 9 months old or when they begin to grow more teeth and can handle it better, but it’s just a personal choice from my experiences.

Even though I have had four children i’m always nervous about that transition from smooth puree baby jars to finger foods. When I first start, I prefer to have somebody in the house with me just incase something bad happens. I was the same with Aurora when I started weaning her.

I guess after the experience with Wyatt my confidence has shrunk but I pushed through. When I first started giving Aurora finger foods, it was usually strawberries, bananas and she eventually tried eggy bread. I slowly started introducing more foods to her and added in the toast but when I did, I watched her like a hawk and didn’t move an inch until she’d finished. Any slight gag, i’d be on egg shells but I managed to calm myself and let her learn the appropriate skills she needed to eat properly.

Now she eats everything! Starting weaning that little bit later than the recommended 6 months hasn’t affected her development at all and it’s given me that extra time to slowly do it at our own pace and not feel pressured. It also gave my nerves some rest.

I will be doing the same with Kiiara by slowly starting off with baby puree jars and of course continue to breastfeed too. I’m not ready to give that up just yet. I was breastfeeding Aurora until she was 14 months old but then my milk dried up because of my pregnancy with Kiki.

As I prepare myself for the weaning of Kiiara, I will also have to start potty training Aurora. So far I haven’t made much progress with her – she doesn’t seem to want to park her tiny bottom on the potty, but i’m sure she will do it in her own time (Stubborn ass! Excuse the pun).

I forgot how much hard work it is to have a toddler and a baby at the same time with Faith and Wyatt being much older now, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. They will be a mischievous pair running around together. I can see it now just how Faith and Wyatt were when they were toddlers – I hope Aurora and Kiiara cut me a bit of slack though.

Let the fun begin!

 

If you liked this post, please drop us a like and share with your friends! You can read more posts here!

 

-Zoe

 

 

Featured Photo by Sydney Troxell from Pexels

100th Post-versary!

We started our journey 5 months ago, and now we’re here celebrating our 100th post. Read about the struggles, the happy times and the adventures in our post-versary right here!

Wow! I can’t believe that it has been 5 months since we wrote our first post Welcoming Kiiara to the World. We are now on our ONE HUNDREDTH POST! Time flies when you’re having fun!

I remember when the idea first came to us to start the blog. We were in Liverpool at the time unhappy about where we were residing and was longing to return to our home town. I’ve always wanted to write but I didn’t have much confidence. I felt like I didn’t have much for myself especially with no friends and family close by, so I spoke to Liam who suggested we start blogging. At first I was a little skeptical about the idea. I honestly didn’t think people would want to hear what goes on in my head but I’m glad we started doing it.

You see it’s a nice way to release how i’m feeling, engage with the world and open up different topics for people to discuss over, and write about things that i’m passionate about with complete openness and honesty.

I think being honest is important. As you may have read from some of my previous posts i’ve gone into the nitty gritty details about how much the children drive me crazy sometimes, sharing my struggles, showing the children growing up, and of course the fun family days out!

Ever since starting this blog it’s become an important part of my life. I love being able to connect with you all and let you all know what I’ve been up to and I really appreciate you all taking the time to actually read my mad rants about the most random of things.

We have done a lot in 5 months from having Kiiara, to moving house, Aurora turning two years old, Faith and Wyatt becoming little teenagers early and much much more. The children have changed so much. We have all come a long way since we first started blogging and I can’t wait to see what the rest of the year holds and be able to share it with you all! We seek to continue posting on a daily basis (apart from weekends ofcourse) and hopefully post more exciting adventures with plenty of photos (and possible videos too).

I would like to say a MASSIVE THANK YOU for all your support. It means alot to us that you take time out of your day to read our blogs!

I can honestly say my confidence has grown since starting this blog and has made me realise that I can be myself and not just a Mum, despite most of my blogs being about my children. But who doesn’t like to share stories about their children and their little antics? (some perhaps not so good though)

Seeing as it’s the one hundredth post, I would love to hear some suggestions about things you would like to see on future blog posts! (might actually help us decide what things you’d like to hear about or see in our future posts).

…….Or even just drop in for a chat with somebody who will listen. I’ll make sure to get back to you!

I’m here for you all just like you have all been there for us too.

So thank you all again for your continued support! Here’s for another 100 posts!

 

If you liked this post, please drop us a like and share with your friends! You can catch up on any posts you haven’t read here!

 

-Zoe

Children’s Television – Reflecting on the Past

Children’s television has certainly changed over the years. Despite all new and modern programmes coming out today, my kids seem to enjoy the older programmes I used to watch as a kid myself. I reflect over kids programmes from the past vs programmes released today. Read about it here!

Have you ever had those moments where you sit down to have a nice relaxing coffee after the hussle bussle of the morning rush getting the children all ready for school and getting them there on time?

You have a million and one things to do but your toddler wants you to sit on the sofa with them for a little while they want to watch their favourite programme. It’s fine because that’s just a little slice of peace before the chaos of the rest of the day unfolds.

Well I tend to do this with Aurora every morning. Her two favourite programmes are ‘Waffle the Wonder Dog‘ and ‘Teletubbies‘, and one of them drives me completely crazy. I have even started singing the theme tune to myself when i’m doing something else.

Can you guess which children’s programme drives me to insanity?………..

It’s Waffle the Wonder Dog of course.

I don’t mind a bit of Teletubbies – I can tolerate that just fine but Waffle, certainly not! Somebody help me!

As I’m writing this I still have the theme tune swimming around in my head.

‘Oh Waffle, oh Waffle, leaping around like a frog.

We just want to say one thing you’re such a clever dog.

So many nights we’re awake when you’re woofing, but we still love you!

Everybody! Waffle doggy. Waffle doggy.

You’re such a clever dog, you’re such a clever dog you are. Oh oh oh oh oh.’

Aurora seems to love it even though it’s usually the same episodes over and over again. It’s also on demand (helpless sigh).

I hear you ask why put myself through the torture if I hate it so much? Well as many of you know toddlers scream very very loudly. I think i’d prefer sending myself a little bit loopy with the Waffle song than to a screaming banshee running around the house after me.

I remember the days when the programmes were much different, and in my eyes much better too! Many of the children’s programmes nowadays are computer generated, including Teletubbies, Bob the builder, PJ Masks, Fireman Sam and more.

What happened to the good-old television shows like Bear in the Big Blue House, Funny Bones, Rolie Polie Olie, Tweenies, Bill and Ben The Flower Pot Men, Arthur, Rosie and Jim, Tots TV and Noddy?

I loved these when I was a kid! There was so much more imagination, time and effort put into these programmes than what there seems to be nowadays. I think it’s disappointing to say the least. I think this generation of children are really missing out.

I’ve found some of these programs on YouTube, even older versions of Teletubbies which is much different to the one they currently air on TV. Noo-Noo was blue for a start. I’m guessing he broke and they needed a new hoover after his years of service and chose a yellow and orange one to replace him.

I showed Faith many of the older programmes we used to watch when we were children and she loved them! She usually asks to watch them on my phone. The one she likes the most is Funny bones.

I haven’t showed them to Aurora yet but I might introduce her to Bear in the Big Blue House because it was my absolute favourite when I was growing up, and I’m hoping it will give this Mummy a break from Waffle Doggy too (fingers crossed).

 

I’d love to hear if any of your little one’s have a favourite programme that drives you loopy too. Peppa pig perhaps? Or something completely different? You can also let us know a program you loved as a child. Please drop it in the comments section below!

 

If you liked this post, please drop us a like and share with your friends. You can read more posts here!

 

-Zoe

Communication Frustration – The Importance of Communicating in a Relationship

I had a really bad day yesterday, but what’s even worse is that I kept it all bottled up. In a relationship, it’s important to talk to each other about your problems and frustrations otherwise it can simply make things worse. I talk about this and more in today’s post. Check it out here!

Have you ever been annoyed about something your spouse was doing, or just let things build up on top of you which makes the small problems ten times worse in your head? – You put so much pressure on yourself and take it out on your other half.

I’d say most of us do this including myself. You see i’m an over thinker and I get worked up over what I have to get done in a day and to get it done in a certain amount of time, and if I don’t achieve this then it really pisses me off. It will tend to put me in a grumpy mood all day.

I understand it’s hard to get everything done when you have a demanding toddler who wants this, that and the other, and a baby that needs feeding who will only fall asleep attached to the boob, but I just get frustrated. I’m one of those people who like to be organised and like things done in a certain way so i’m not running around all day like a headless chicken until it’s time to drop flat on the bed from exhaustion.

I was quite proud of myself the other day. It might sound silly but I feel so unproductive despite the plethora of washing I do everyday, cleaning the kitchen and more. I wanted to do more than just attending to the usual rooms. I felt like i’m forever cleaning the same rooms over and over and over again many times a day.

I wanted to feel like i’ve done something else other than that. I’ve managed to sort out Wyatts room and it felt good. It’s finally organised! Liam made a remark that I have OCD but I just don’t like clutter – i’ve always been the same ever since I was young.

Anyhow yesterday was a day from hell. I put so much pressure on myself to get things done and I usually sit and think what I need to do whilst i’m feeding Kiiara. Doing that I think makes it worse because I can’t do it until she’s finished, which could take up to an hour. I do know that so long as the children are looked after and had their needs met then all is well, but I dislike just sitting down and not getting the things I want to done.

Needless to say I didn’t get half the stuff done I put in place for myself yesterday and I became pissed off and told Liam I’ve had enough. I can’t keep overwhelming myself with things. I just couldn’t wait to go to bed!

I felt like everything was just being piled on me from looking after the children to doing all the housework, bedtime routine etc. I know he’s got his own things to work on throughout the day but it just felt like it was getting too much yesterday.

So as a stubborn moo, rather than talking to Liam, I just point blank became annoyed with him – I just wanted to get the day over with. He was getting on my nerves just being around him. I just wanted to be left alone to my own thoughts so I could mope and be mad in peace.

It doesn’t do me any good thinking like this and it doesn’t help relationships either holding on to built up anger – it will just make things worse and you will drift apart doing this and it’s certainly not what I want.

I love him dearly and I wouldn’t know what to do without him. He’s the man I plan on spending the rest of my life with, so I will get back onto the….


Importance of communication in a relationship


We spoke last night about how I was feeling and we talked it through. He had thrown out suggestions about ways I could try to make it easier for myself if I ever felt like that again. He spoke about how he was feeling too and I must say I felt much better talking it through with him!

It takes me a while to talk but when I do it really helps no matter what the problem is. Whether big or small, after getting your feelings out to each other and listening, it helps you both understand each others feelings and to come to a compromise over a solution to sort it all out.

So if any of you have any problems with your spouse or need them to help with something, remember they are only human and can’t read minds (I think I have to remind myself of this one sometimes). Talking things through is definitely an important part of ANY healthy relationship.

It’s much better trying to talk things through instead of getting to a point where you resent that person so there’s no way back to that loving relationship, all because of that pent up emotion.

I think I need to try to open up more instead of letting things get to me for a few days or so before I finally let Liam know what’s bothering me. It would save a lot of frustration and would resolve the problem much sooner, which means making up will be a lot quicker too.

I’m hoping this weekend will bring peace and quiet. I need a break from the chaos of everyday life – time for myself whether that be a soak in the bath or just to catch up on my sleep for an hour. This Mama needs some alone time with a big box of chocolates and no distractions to recuperate and prepare for the following week ahead!

 

If you liked this post, please drop us a like and share with your friends! You can read more posts here!

 

-Zoe

 

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Little Joys and Temptations – My Guilty Pleasures

Every person has their own little guilty pleasure to cope with the effects of stress – it helps make us feel better and resume what we are doing. I delve into my guilty pleasures and why I enjoy them so much. Check it out here!

When you become a parent you realise how much you enjoy your guilty pleasures just that little bit more than you used to. I know I seem to anyway (surely I can’t be the only one?).

I’ve always loved reading since I was young and my Mum mentioned the other day that I would fall asleep with a book still in my hands. I mustn’t have changed much from when I was younger because I still now fall asleep reading a book. I seem to enjoy it much more now though as it’s something I really look forward to when settling into bed after a long day with the children and the housework.

I usually get lost in a book and zone out to the rest of the world. It’s my relaxation time – a little bit of time for myself. As you could imagine with four children I don’t get much of that so I enjoy the time I do get.

Another guilty pleasure of mine is sweety treats. I know it’s probably not a healthy habit to have especially with doing my boogie bounce routine atleast once a week and attempting to get fit, but I just can’t resist having some chocolate or sweets occasionally. I’m starting to think I might have a sweety addiction. It’s definitely a guilty pleasure of mine and Liam’s too (although Liam is trying to cut down). We usually get treats in for the weekend including popcorn, sweets and chocolate (for a movie night of course!).

The next guilty pleasure of mine is a good bottle of wine. At the moment i’ve been consuming Lambrini but do look to other brands too. I’ve recently come across a new flavour which tastes like Summer (How can you taste Summer you ask? Well passionfruit comes close). I really enjoy having a glass with my dinner just to relax and wind down before I have to plod on with the bedtime routine.

The bedtime routine is always a little crazy. It’s like hoarding a bunch of sheep. Wyatt showers first but then he forgets what he has to use to wash his body and his hair despite instructing him the last few days prior to that. Faith usually chases Aurora around our home whilst i’m trying to do the dishes. I end up yelling like a maniac because she doesn’t listen to me even by the fifth time of telling her to stop. Somebody is bound to get hurt one day!

Faith finally goes in the shower but takes all her toys in with her and could literally stay in there for a hour or more if I didn’t turn it off and shout for her to get out (such a shower hog!).

Don’t get me started on the little demon child Aurora. She doesn’t mind going in the bath. It’s getting dry, getting her pajamas on and brushing her teeth that seems to be the problem. She screams and fights against me every night. At least Kiiara likes the bath and doesn’t seem to be a problem getting in and out.

After that, it’s then time to get them all to bed (woohoo!)

One other guilty pleasure of mine is smoking. As much as I’d love to quit, especially because of the health risks, I honestly don’t see it happening anytime soon. It’s my little time out when the kids are driving me crackers and i’m completely stressed out. It helps me to calm down and rationalise my thoughts, and helps me get through the day (I don’t recommend anyone to smoke. There are other ways of dealing with stress – this is just mine).

Last but not least my other guilty pleasure funnily enough is whipped cream. I have it on my coffee every morning and on my afternoon coffee too! I also must not forget to include a nice hot chocolate before getting into bed to enjoy when reading my book too!

 

What’s your guilty pleasure? What do you do to wind down after a long day?

Please leave your comments below!

 

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-Zoe

 

 

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I’m Sorry I’m a Millennial

A sort-of sequel to last weeks post ‘Overcoming Shyness’. This time I go into the thoughts and feelings of Millennials – why they are the way they are. Read more about it here!

I want to do that, but I simply have no time for it.

I want to do that, but I simply can’t do it.

I want to do that, but I’m simply too anxious for it.

I want to do that, but it’s taking too long. 

I want to do that, but I don’t have the skills for it.

I want to do that, but I’m afraid of what others will think of me.

I want to do that, but I’ll look silly doing it. 

Sound familiar?

I watched a video on YouTube the other day about Millennials – why they are the way they are- self interested, lazy, undisciplined, ‘entitled’ and unfocused. It was very fascinating and insightful as to what has caused millennials to become so dependent on other people, increasingly anxious and depressed, and losing sociability with their peers. If you wish to view the video yourself, you can watch it here!

A Millennial is a person who was born in the 1980’s or the early 1990’s as explained by the Cambridge Dictionary

As a millennial myself, I can agree with most of what was being said. Reliance on technology has become an addiction and it slowly draws away time from more important things, such as my family, work, the opportunity to socialise in person with friends, and improving self knowledge by reading more.

I don’t want to feel anxious over talking to someone new.

I don’t want to be afraid to do something I want to do. 

I don’t want to waste time during the day when I could be doing something I love doing.

This is why I am reprogramming my mindset – the way I do things, the way I think, the way I discipline myself.

I’ve found social media to be a distraction. I could spend most of my time on it. It draws me in and once i’m on it, i’m hooked. You could even suggest it’s a time machine because one minute on it will jet you off into the future, hours later.

This isn’t productive. That time spent on social media could allow me to spend more time with the kids, go out with friends, enjoy reading a lengthy book and so on. I’m not saying I want to avoid going on it completely – it’s nice to get updated about what’s happening around the world, but just to moderate my time more efficiently on it. As he explains in the video, it’s all about balance – it’s okay to spend time doing something, but too much of it can be disruptive. 

We seek to be acknowledged. We seek to be listened to. We seek to follow instructions. But that doesn’t help us when we want to do things ourselves. We need to be able to do things on our own, without needing someones elses instructions. We should be able to figure stuff out on our own. The fact that this is happening, is a big problem. It’s no fault of our own.

As a parent, i’m lucky enough to have witnessed great parenting and so I know generally how to parent well and do things for the kids that are the ‘right’ things to do. Without guidance and without witnessing others, I may not have been as confident as I am now – I can’t imagine how i’d deal with the kids if it wasn’t for my past experiences.

I’ve seen people, parents included on their phones walking about with their eyes glued to their screens. Some even do it at school when they go to pick up their kids. This isn’t right or healthy to be perfectly honest. When you pick up your kids from school, there’s no need to be on Facebook chatting to someone who isn’t even there – you should be focussed on picking your children up – they demand your attention. Whoever you are talking to or whatever you are doing on your phone, are they or is it really more important than your own children? Think about that for a second. 

Without changing the way we do things, we are continuously going to go in the same direction. We are still going to become anxious around new people, we are still going to be afraid of trying something new, we are still not going to have enough time to do whatever it is we want to do. That is unless we cut out bad temptations and learn to discipline ourselves out of our rut. Think on it.

Again if you wish to watch the video, you can find it here.

P.S. For all you that have watched the video, I bought an alarm clock! (Told you i’m serious about it!) 

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-Liam

Our Super Saturday!

We enjoyed a great Saturday at an event in our local area called ‘Prom Xtra’. There were funfair rides, free activities, helicopter rides and more. Read all about it here!

There is an event that happens every year in our home town called ‘Prom Xtra’.

Many people come far and wide to visit, and there is a lot of things to do with the children. There’s fairground rides, food stalls, free activities (like mini quad bikes on the sand, beach rugby, segways etc) and creative tents.

We decided to get up early and get out the house by quarter past 10. I must say that’s quite an achievement on the weekend – we rarely leave by 11am! We made our way to the beach where this event was held to have a look around. They have shrunk it over the years – there used to be much more going on when we were younger but it was good nonetheless.

There were rides for the younger children, stalls, bouncy castles, real owls, meerkats, live performances, hovercrafts, helicopter rides and ofcourse rides for the bigger kids too!

Liam decided to take advantage of the quiet and had a go on the hovercraft before the queues started to appear. He looked like he enjoyed himself.

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Photo Courtesy of Plimley Media (That isn’t Liam by the way. I didn’t manage to take a photo of him on it unfortunately)

We decided to get the older children to meet us down there with their Dad. We didn’t want them missing out as its only on once a year, and besides they have never been on any rides before.

It took forever before he arrived. We were waiting around for at least an hour before they got there. He was a complete idiot to go the long way round, but in the meantime whilst we were waiting, Liam got some photos of the helicopter taking off and landing.

We were hoping to go in the helicopter ourselves but we missed it. They had to leave early to sort out a crash elsewhere. To be honest I was quite disappointed. I’m terrified of heights but it would have been great to face my fears once and for all.

We took the children on some rides. They we’re really excited. Wyatt was a little hesitant on what rides he wanted to go on because he said most of them were scary. He settled on a train ride and a motorbike ride that just went around in a loop.

Faith was a little braver and went on a little balloon ride. She asked for Liam to go on with her. It was a heart melting moment – they do really have a great bond. They even took a selfie together!

Faith also wanted to go on a swing ride. She was the only one on there. I’m starting to think that I should have gone on with her because as it started to swing she got scared and ended up crying. There was nothing we could do until the ride stopped. We felt awful trying to reassure her it was ok. As soon as the ride stopped she jumped off and ran straight to Liam.

“Daddy, it scared me.”

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She soon calmed down and went on another ride. They went on the mini quad bikes on the sand. It was a long queue but they seemed to really enjoy themselves when they had their turn. Wyatt nearly knocked over the man at one point. He had such a serious face on him – it was really funny to watch him.

Liam and I went on a few rides ourselves. Everytime this event has been on in the past 2 years i’ve always been pregnant – not this time though. So it was definitely play time. We went on ‘DJ Bounce’ and the ‘Sizzlers’. It was fun to be a kid for a few hours!

The only downfall of our day was that we all ended up sunburnt, even Aurora. I felt awful because I forgot the sun lotion. We didn’t realise it would get as hot as it did later on in the day. I will make sure I don’t forget it next time that’s for sure!

We spent the whole day at ‘Prom Xtra’. It was a very fun-filled Saturday. We were completely shattered when we got back home but of course there wasn’t any rest for the wicked as I had all the housework to do.

Friday and Saturday were very long days indeed and Sunday was too. We went birthday shopping for Faith this time, but I have got all her presents now. She just needs to get her ears pierced closer to her birthday. It does pay off to be organised sometimes.

 

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-Zoe

Celebrating Aurora’s Birthday – It’s Party Time!

Aurora had her birthday last Friday. She thoroughly enjoyed it. How I still can’t believe she’s 2 years old now. Read about her birthday and her birthday party here!

It was Aurora’s birthday on Friday. She’s finally 2 years old and boy don’t we know it.

The terrible twos have hit hard. Liam now calls her banshee as she has a blood curdling scream if she doesn’t get her own way and jeez, the tantrums – I’m surprised her head doesn’t spin round!

Anyhow she had a fun filled birthday. She enjoyed opening her presents and all the attention she was getting. This Mama even cried – my little baby isn’t so little anymore.

She got a princess tent and absolutely loved it! At first she was a little bit hesitant to go in it, so Daddy went in just to show her it was safe and fun to play in.

Auntie Lisa popped over to bring her some prezzies and spent the day with us. She helped out with the kids whilst I dashed round to clean the house before the rest of our visitors came along after the school run. Liam was running around getting the decorations put up. It’s amazing how quickly I got the housework done without any children under my feet.

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We went and collected the children from school. Then it was a mad dash back to get the party food cooking before everyone arrived. It was one hell of a busy day. We didn’t stop from the minute we woke up until bedtime.

While Liam sorted out the party food I was making sure the children didn’t end up bickering over Auroras new toys, but they seemed to have played nicely together besides a few warnings thrown at them.

Aunty Emma arrived with her eldest two children. Lisa went to let her in. Then the screaming started – Aurora wanted to go downstairs with Lisa. The screams coming from her literally sounded like she was in agony, but she just wanted to see her cousins. We explained that they will be up in a minute but there is no reasoning with a grumpy, tired over excited toddler!

 

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When they finally arrived up the mountain of stairs you have to climb to get to our place, Aurora soon cheered up and they went off playing together. I might sound completely nuts but i’ve always loved a house full of kids (when they are behaving of course).

We had sandwiches made, cakes (woohoo! I love cake!), chicken strips, duck spring rolls and of course we couldn’t forget the mini sausage rolls. Aurora loves them and mini pizzas too. Everybody seemed to have a good time, especially the children.

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Even though it was only a small get together with family It was a great day. The adult’s chatted away amoungst each other whilst the kids went wild.

Even Nana, Grandad (Liam’s Dad), and Aunty Tiff came over.

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When it’s a special occasion I usually let the oldest two children enjoy a fizzy drink. They were really excited about it. They got very hyper from the sugar but seeing as how it was a special occasion, I thought why not? And besides, they we’re going to their Dads later on so he was the one who had to deal with their craziness for a bit!

All in all we had a really fun day. Aurora was shattered by the end of the night but she still ended up waking at 6:50am the next morning.

Now our little demon angel is two, it will soon be time to begin potty training her. I’ll have to convince her to actually sit on it instead of cuddling it as if it’s a teddy. I have some work cut out for me I think.

 

What do you usually do for your childs birthday? Do you go out somewhere nice? Or have a family get-together? I’d love to hear about it! Please let us know in the comments section below!

 

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-Zoe

Looking Back: Aurora Grows Up

Today is Auroras 2nd BIRTHDAY! Time certainly flies by. We reflect on Auroras first 2 years on this planet so far. Check it out now!

Two years ago today I had this beautiful little girl in my arms.

She was a much awaited typical girl. She made us wait 6 days past her due date, but she was definitely worth the wait. Miss Aurora May arrived at 4:48am weighing 7lb 9oz.

A little piece of me and Liam. She was just perfect. Watching her grow up was just an amazing experience. Even though i’ve got the older two, it had been a while since I had a newborn to take care of. Each baby is a blessing – watching their personalities blossom leaves you in a state of euphoria.

I had to learn how to bring up a baby again. I was very hesitant when it came to weaning her. I always panicked incase she would choke so I took it at my own pace. She is now a gannet and will eat anything.

Her personality has definitely shone through. I can’t believe this tiny baby is now 2 years old – a boisterous little toddler who’s lovable and a little bit crazy. I’m so proud of how far she has come along with her speech. She just doesn’t stop talking now.

She learnt a new word from Daddy a while ago – ‘naan bread‘, but being a typical toddler it doesn’t come out like that. Instead she utters ‘knob head‘. As you could imagine it’s certainly a cringe moment when other people are in ear shot, but I can’t help but laugh.

Her brain is like a sponge at the moment. Being a Mum is hard but I do love watching them all grow and become who they are.

Even though I’m excited it’s Aurora’s birthday, i’m still quite emotional. She’s growing up too quickly and she will be going into playgroup in September. I’m going to cherish every moment until then, apart from the days she turns demonic – those days i’ll be hiding away scoffing chocolate.

Hold your little one’s close. They don’t stay babies for long. They change all of the time. You may not notice it on a day to day basis but looking back on the photos of our sweet girl, she has changed so much in 2 years it’s unbelievable.

 

If you liked this post, please drop us a like and share with your friends! You can read more posts here!

Keep an eye out next week when we’ll post all about Auroras birthday and our weekend out!

 

-Zoe

The Kid Who Has No Emotion & an Attempt to Remain Calm

Upon dealing with 4 children on a daily basis, it can be hard work especially with one who has special needs. Find out who has been hard work lately, which kid has no emotion, and how I managed to bruise my nose. Read about it here!

I think all of us have had situations where the kids have drove us completely bonkers – whether they are not listening, having tantrums in the supermarket or fighting with their siblings.

There’s always something that our children do to tick us off. No matter how much we love them it’s hard living with people who have different personalities whether they are children or adults.

Yesterday was one of those days where I was put to the test as a parent. Just a few days ago I said to myself I’m going to try not to become stressed out and worked up, and just take things one step at a time.

I managed this for about 2 days. It felt great not to lose my shit all of the time and think that i’ve got this to do and that to do by this time. It was overwhelming and damn right putting me in a foul mood.

Yesterday though I did lose my shit as soon as I picked the children up from school. They were bickering. Faith even turned around to me and uttered

“Why did you have to have a boy? I hate my brother!”

I laughed and replied back,

“Well you don’t have to like him, but he’s your brother so you have to love him.”

She growled at me and complained all the way home about how irritating he is. Sibling love for you right there! I was the same with my older Sister.

The chaos carried on when we arrived home. All 4 children we’re not happy at the same time and I honestly felt like ripping my hair out. I do feel sorry for the neighbours, especially when they are all going off on one at the same time.

I decided after an hour of them not listening and driving this Mummy absolutely batty, that I would start tea earlier and get them to bed as soon as I could. I needed a break.

I told Wyatt to get ready for his shower and as I was turning it on for him, the bath mat slipped beneath my feet and I went flying face first straight into the bathtub and landed on my nose.

I thought I broke it at first but luckily enough I think I’ve just bruised it. My main concern was Kiiara as she was in my arms when I fell. I panicked, screaming for Liam as I thought Kiiara smacked her head but luckily it turned out that I had broken her fall and she just got slightly wet from the shower.

I felt like a terrible Mum even though it was an accident. It could have been much worse but it didn’t seem to phase her. As soon as I changed her out of her wet clothes she was giggling away at me.

Wyatt didn’t flinch after my fall even though he saw the whole thing – he just got undressed and climbed in the shower like nothing even happened. I must admit his lack of emotion worries me.

Hopefully after getting an appointment at the doctors, we can get the ball rolling with a diagnosis for him. I know this will take a while but at least it’s a step in the right direction.

With his difficulties it makes me worry about who he’s going to become when he’s older and whether he’s going to cope with living in the big wide world independently.

As a parent with a child with learning difficulties it’s really hard sometimes. I have to think and take a step back and realise that it’s probably not the best option to discipline him the same as I do with the other’s. He has less of an understanding about what he’s done wrong. He tends to zone out and not retain eye contact but he is also the most mischievous out of them all.

I’m hoping with a diagnosis we will learn a better way of dealing with his behaviour, when to just let it go if it’s a minor issue, and work with him to understand what’s going on in the little head of his.

Today seems to be much calmer besides the demanding toddler who is going to be 2 years old tomorrow. I’m so excited! I can’t wait to see her little face in the morning when she sees all of her presents, plus this Mummy wants cake!

We also have an event on the weekend that we are attending with loads of rides, wooohooo! I’m definitely going on some of them because every time i’ve gone, i’ve been pregnant, but not this year.

We will share our antics of our weekend and Aurora’s birthday party with you so keep an eye out for those!

 

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-Zoe

Overcoming Shyness

I was quite shy as a teenager. I still haven’t overcome it, even now. Why am I shy? Will my kids go the same way? What have I done to prevent it? Find this out and more here!

This is a big topic and a difficult one for me to share with you all.

I’m quite a confident writer – I know what I want to say and I write it down, thinking about what I’m going to say before I type, and correct it if I need to change it.

On the other hand however, I’m not so very confident within a person-to-person conversation other than with people I am currently comfortable with, such as my family and friends.

Upon meeting new people, some can be very open, confident and don’t hold back – full eye contact, tall posture, and great open body language. I’m not that person. I wish I was, but something prevents me from doing that. A mentality obstacle that I just can’t seem to shift.

I have a few ideas on where it might have derived from, although years later I still haven’t changed much. This began within my childhood.

As a child I was quite open and friendly. I used to get shouted at a lot by my parents – it was quite scary at the time and this brought me down (Not saying my parents were bad people, they’re not, they just tried to reign in my behaviour).

I felt as if I had to think about the consequences of doing something even before I did it. It’s usually a normal thing parent’s try to teach their children, but I was quite a sensitive child and it slowly closed me off.

Another factor I believe contributed to my future shyness was in school. I was quite a chatty young teenager starting high school. I had friends and messed about in class (like any other child would do).

I wasn’t a naughty kid but I kept getting shouted at and sent to the head teachers office for misbehaving. As I was a still a sensitive young boy, I took ‘getting told off’ quite badly. It upset me – I didn’t like making other people unhappy, and I began to follow the rules quite seriously.

I was a SWOT (for any of you who don’t know what a SWOT is, it’s someone who values their education and teachers more than their social life – not someone who is particularly popular). I made sure I was on-time, or even early to get to my lessons – I didn’t want to get told off for being late. I became less and less social with my peers too – I just got on with my school work and put my head down.

I wasn’t exactly a tall person either. Taller people have height which in turn seems to help become more confident in oneself. I would have loved to have been tall, but I couldn’t do much to help that so I had to settle for being short and get on with it.

I don’t like the pressure children are put under to behave the way schools want you to. You should be taught to know the rules, and if you disagree with them for a good enough reason, know whether to break them or not. After all in this day and age, whoever has ‘the power’ (governments for instance) enjoy telling others what to do and to do things within their rules whether you like it or not, but they don’t follow the same rules themselves – quite unfair and hypocritical to be honest.

I don’t want my children growing up to be put down from someone else’s ruling telling them that they aren’t good kids, and that they have to follow their rules whether they like it or not (not saying this is the case for parenting most of the time, but mainly for rules made to ‘control’ your children).

I guess in a mild way I am traumatized by having grown up to be controlled by someone else’s rules. I am a grown adult and still feel like i’m not old enough to do things ‘adults’ are allowed to do.

How I cope with this – for starters I have to remind myself that I am indeed a grown adult and are legally aloud to do pretty much anything I want. I also shouldn’t have to settle for something I am not happy with – I tell myself that I have the power to change it if I feel so strongly about it.

Secondly I think about how other people, even much older people than me, were once kids and have grown up to become adults (like me) and have been in the same shoes.

Even though they may be a different shape, height or look completely different from me, there is still a human being inside there who has to work to support themselves and their family, pays tax, celebrates special occasions, enjoys leisure time and so on. Basically speaking, just bringing them down to my own level – it helps me feel comfortable around them.

Thirdly I find a common topic that we could talk about extensively (could be football, a new movie getting released, cars, new technology etc) – this opens up almost an endless conversation in which we then have common ground with, creating a connection and making ourselves comfortable to talk to.

I’m still not 100% comfortable talking to new people – I get quite anxious (especially making phone calls), but I hope with new opportunities becoming available and as I connect with more people, I can overcome my past long lived ‘shyness’, feel more confident in myself and grow as a person in the near future.

 

If you’ve ever felt the same way or would just like to talk about it, please let me know in the comments section below! 

 

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-Liam

Growing Up – Changing Throughout The Years

From my teenage years to adulthood. That huge transition from good and bad experiences has helped me become the person I am today. Could I have become a different person if I experienced life differently? Perhaps… Find this out and more here!

I decided to treat myself today and get my hair done.

The hairdresser who did it I have known for years, since I was in year 1 to be exact! We also went to high-school together but even though we were close friends when we were younger, life took us both into different directions.

We had a good catch up today and I realised how much I have changed over the years and also how fast the years have actually flown by.

We reminisced about high school and talked about how I was always bunking school. I was a little rebel to be honest but that was mainly because I was getting bullied and felt like I wasn’t being listened to.

We spoke about the people we used to hang around with in school and it made me wonder what they are all doing now after all this time. Other than Tom and Staci, I didn’t keep in contact with anybody else.

Life was so different back then even though high school was not the highlight of my youth, but things were a lot simpler in those days despite not having felt like it.

I was one of those kids who hated school and wasn’t interested in learning and getting straight A’s, but if I could do school over again I would do it differently. I could say I’d do a lot of things differently if i’m honest.

I have good memories of growing up which include staying out until 4am and drinking lambrini, but I’ve realised now as a Mum myself how much worry I must have put my parents in having got up to so much mischief throughout my teenage years.

It got me contemplating how much I’ve changed over the years and how the experiences I’ve had in my life shaped who I am today. I mean now I’d say I’m quite mature.

I do like to have fun and mess around though, but I wouldn’t see myself going partying and getting drunk. Instead however I’d quite happily snuggle up with a good book, get a takeaway and have a glass of wine! (Who’s with me on this one?)

I’d consider myself more outspoken these days too. It has got me in trouble quite a few times but I remember the days where I would just go with what other people said and be very quiet and closed off.

I wouldn’t say that was the best way to live. It made me feel that nobody truly knew me properly, as I always showed only what I thought people would like about me and hid the rest of myself.

Ever since I met Liam, and it might sound really cheesy but I realised that I could trust him and could be my crazy self around him without judgement. It also made me realise I shouldn’t care what other people think about me or whether they like me or not. I should just focus on the people who love me for who I am.

When it comes to growing up I’ve noticed that we worry about fitting in with everybody else, what they think of us and even try to change the way we are to make people like us rather than just being ourselves.

I think with all experiences I’ve had growing up, the good and the bad have made me who I am today, and I think I like the person i’ve become. It’s just amazing to think of all the changing faces and personalities I went through to get to where I am today.

Does anybody else look back and think “Wow, I’ve changed so much since I was younger”?

 

If you liked this post, please drop us a like and share with your friends! You can read more posts here!

 

-Zoe

A Bouncing Bargain and a Home Workout

I found a pretty decent bargain that has encouraged me to start working out for a Summer body at home. Find out more about this here!

As you may know if you read Liam’s post (Trying Something New – Boogie Bounce Xtreme) a little while ago, I joined a fitness class which I dragged him along to called ‘Boogie Bounce Xtreme’.

I really enjoyed going and it was nice to get out and do something fun as a couple without the children. We have been looking into couples workout classes as well. Yoga looks like fun! I’m not really flexible, but I wouldn’t mind giving it a go anyway. You only live once, so why not get out of your comfort zone and try something new!

Even though I enjoyed boogie bounce, I haven’t been back for a while because Kiiara is a Mummy’s girl and she point blank refuses to take a bottle. She’s stuck in her bedtime routine which means she gets very grumpy if i’m not there.

While we we’re out on the weekend we came across a fitness trampoline in a charity shop. It was much like the one we used in boogie bounce but without the T-bar. For only £4.99 it was definitely a bargain!

I wasn’t too sure at first whether to purchase it but as I wanted to get fit and in shape, and want to have something for myself, I thought why not? I can also be around the children at the same time without worrying whether Kiiara is going to be upset .

I also bought some fitness wear from B&M on Saturday when we went to pick Aurora’s birthday cake up. I can’t believe she’s going to be 2 years old on Friday! I don’t know where the time has gone.

As the sun was out yesterday, we thought we would take a stroll down the beach with the girls and enjoy the view. Liam took some photos with his camera too. We arrived back home and I thought that I’d have a go on the trampoline.

Liam found a 15 minute workout on YouTube for me to follow. Some of the workouts we’re easy enough, but I struggled with some of them including having to raise your leg to the side, lifting your hip as you do it.

I ended up with cramp in my hip so I had to stop a few times during this exercise. Liam even had a go on it too which helped me feel less like a plonker just jumping around becoming sweaty.

Hopefully with more practice I will get the hang of it. I’m hoping to do this workout session twice a week. It does make me feel more energetic. I actually felt like I was accomplishing something, and despite not seeming like much, it’s a step towards taking a bit of myself back. It was a lot of fun to do and it was a bonus that it was in the comfort of my own home (prevented embarrassment, yay!).

I am certainly feeling it today though. At least I know it’s done something – no pain no gain I guess. Now it’s back to normality again.

It was a really fun long weekend. I actually stayed up later than 9pm (shocking I know!), which is unusual for me because I usually can’t stay awake. We invited Lisa over on Saturday. We had a chinese takeaway, treats, some wine and had plenty of giggles.

I enjoy having family that live so close. It was a fairly relaxing weekend. We definitely needed it.

 

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-Zoe

Society Pushing ‘Beauty’ on our Children

Advertisements we see on TV, in magazines, on billboards and more push the concept of what beauty looks and how we should all conform to it. But should it really be pushed on our children? Should our children HAVE TO conform to these standards to fit in? Read about this and more here!

Being a parent, you sit and look at your children and think “Wow they are just beautiful, cute little people!” But what happens when they grow up to, let’s say the ages of between 7 to 18 years old?

Even though we tell our children they are beautiful and that we are proud of who they are, what happens when they start believing otherwise and try changing themselves to how society determines a beautiful person? For example in music videos, movies, modelling, front page magazines etc.

There is a high expectation of average people to look how society deems ‘beautiful’ where people are pushed into the idea that they need to buy the most expensive clothes, hairstyles, and makeup in order to be accepted. And if you look too different or you don’t wear high end brands or plaster yourself in make-up, you are not considered beautiful and can be cast out, or even bullied for it, especially in school!

You see even as an adult I don’t feel beautiful because of what society considers as ‘beautiful’. I don’t have time to do my makeup every day. I wear jeans and a t-shirt and my hair, well it’s washed and brushed and I just leave it down. I’m too busy looking after the children and my home to spend hours dressing myself up.

Don’t get me wrong I’d love to have time to do my makeup everyday and wear stylish clothes, but I just don’t have the time or money to do that. I’m still me and I’m proud of who I am and I think we all should be, whether we are skinny, curvy, in too much of a rush to do your hair properly so settle with a Mum bun, or just rocking your natural beauty.

The reason I brought this topic up is because as I was walking the children to school this morning, I noticed Faith had a hold of my shaver last night and shaved half of her eyebrows off on each eye.

I pulled her up about it and challenged her.

“What were you thinking? It’s dangerous! You know better than to mess with Mummy’s shavers!”

Her reply,

“I just wanted to look pretty. I don’t like my eyebrows because they are really bushy.”

I looked at her and said back,

“You are pretty. You don’t need makeup or need to shave your eyebrows. You are perfect just the way you are!”

Faith has been saying things like this alot recently. I’m not sure whether it’s what people have been saying to her in school, but I think it’s awful for her to feel that way at the age of 7. She doesn’t like how she looks and as her Mother it breaks my heart.

Some of the things she’s said she doesn’t like about herself include

  • Her height – she doesn’t like being small. She’s the shortest one in her class – she gets that from her Mummy.
  • She doesn’t like how skinny she is. That’s also a trait from my side of the family.
  • She’s also a very hairy little girl which she hates the most. To me she is Faith and everything she hates about herself makes her unique.

How can we change our child’s mindset to understand that just being themselves makes them beautiful, unlike advertisements showing them what ‘beauty’ is supposed to look like? These include false eyelashes, false nails, tattooed eyebrows, shaped eyebrows and more.

I not bashing people who use these products – they are in their own right to change their look and do things that make them feel beautiful, because who doesn’t want to look their best?

I just worry about our children and how much pressure they are under to fit in with the ever changing society – to be thinner, wear attractive clothing, and pushed to wear make up.

All we can do as parents is tell our children they are beautiful by just being themselves and remind them that even though looking good is ok, what’s most important is what’s on the inside and that’s what makes them beautiful!

I’m hoping after having a talk with Faith this morning she will realise that she’s pretty just the way she is. We just have to wait for her eyebrows to grow back. It’s a good job however that she has a fringe that hides it well.

 

I’d love to hear if any of you have had any similar conversations with your children about how they look or whether they have done something they shouldn’t have done to make themselves fit in.

 

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-Zoe

Mummy Confessions: Entry 8

Diary entry No. 8 of a stressed-out mum dealing with 4 kids. What it’s like and how it feels to deal with them all at once!

Where do I start….

Yesterday was bloody stressful. I felt completely overwhelmed with it all. You’d think I would be used to it by now with raising 4 children and becoming a Mum at 18 years old, but I just couldn’t hack the stress.

I got up early to attempt to tidy some of the house before the children woke up, but as soon as I took a foot downstairs right on cue every morning, Aurora screamed as if somebody was murdering her.

I quickly jumped in the shower, then ran upstairs to get her out of her cot so she could play in her room before she woke the rest of the house and the neighbours up.

I ran around cleaning up the kitchen, bringing up the washing and waking Faith and Wyatt up to get ready for school. Even though I got up earlier, I still had a million and one jobs to do when I returned home. It turned out Aurora was a bit sick in her cot earlier that morning, so I had to change her bedding.

From the moment I got up I felt completely exhausted and to top it off I had one of those annoying headaches that just wouldn’t budge.

I’ve come up with a new technique so I can get the housework done whilst looking after the youngest two. You see it might sound easy but Kiiara is a very clingy baby and doesn’t like to be put down for too long. And well with Aurora being nearly 2 years old, she doesn’t leave her sister alone when she’s in her bouncer – I’m a worry wart leaving them alone together without myself in the room just in case there’s an accident.

So this new technique involves the pram. I put Kiiara in her pram and push her round the flat with me so I can get things done. I know things will get easier when she’s older but for now it’s something I have to do – as long as she sees me, she’s quite happy.

I think I might need to invest in a baby carrier. It might make it easier than lugging the pram around the flat.

Job One Done but still I felt overwhelmed with everything. Aurora turned into a demonic toddler by the afternoon (where’s the holy water when you need it?). I could have screamed! It was nearly time to pick the children up and it felt like I hadn’t done anything that I wanted to all day.

I could have quite happily gone back to bed and re-start the day again.

After getting the children home from school I lugged bin bags down the stairs, which then one ended up splitting and goo fell down my leg. Could this day get any worse? I returned to hear Kiiara screaming in her pram. She was asleep but Aurora woke her up.

Faith and Wyatt were both talking at me asking for crisps and also bickering with each other. All I wanted was a God damn coffee at the time!

It turned 5pm and I had to put the tea on. I chose to go with a pasta dish because… well it was quick and easy, the oldest two needed a shower and Aurora needed a bath too.

I sent Wyatt first which he then moaned at me because he wanted to finish watching a film with Faith. I managed to get him to move his butt after 5 to 10 minutes of constant nagging over and over (Why don’t they listen the first time!?).

I went to check on the tea whilst he was having a wash. I shouted

“Have you washed your hair?”

He replied,

“Yes”

I went to check to find his hair was still dry (A dry wash? I don’t think so!). This happens every night where I have to do his hair because he refuses to do it despite attempting to convince me he has.

Kiiara was beginning to get restless in my arm’s, Aurora was being cranky because she was overtired, and I had everything else to sort out. At least Faith is at the age where she will go in the shower herself and not need Mummys’ help. She just takes the longest to get out. Girls ayy!

It hit around 6pm and I managed to get the children sorted. They had their tea, brushed their teeth, got into their pjs and I can blatantly say I was eager to get them all to bed.

I still had all the dishes to wash, the washing to sort out, and get the kids to bed. Kiiara was not a happy bunny as she was overtired and ended up screaming. My ears certainly take a beating with the youngest two screaming a lot of the time!

I decided there and then that these kids of mine were going to bed early because this Mama couldn’t take anymore! I needed a break and some sleep. I was asleep by 8pm and to be honest I don’t feel guilty one-little-bit. Being a stay-at-home Mum is hard sometimes!

I still feel a little cranky today and still have the annoying lingering headache, but I’m hoping today will be a little easier than yesterday. If not, then I’ve always got a glass of wine to enjoy!

 

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-Zoe